An important part of our identity is built around our sense of belonging. And our biological identity is also defined according to our genital organs, which determine whether we belong to the male or female sex. For centuries, that belonging has defined the actions of the human being, based on distributions of roles corresponding to each sex. Polarising the characteristics of each group of people at the extremes, extolling the characteristics of one above the other.
Without taking into account that, regardless of their sex, all human beings have a duality made up of their two brain hemispheres, which govern different and complementary functions that would struggle to exist without each other. Where one part is governed by our analytical, rational and cognitive hemisphere more focused on action, which Asian traditions define as masculine energy (yang). And the other is one governed by our emotional, creative and intuitive hemisphere more focused on the ‘being’, also defined as feminine energy (yin).
For many centuries, our society has cultivated logical and rational thinking, strength, hierarchy and power, extolling them above the intuitive, subtle and/or creative while also devaluing these qualities, thereby depriving not just society, but also men and – in particular – women of them.
Women, as main custodians of the feminine energy (although present in all of us), need to be the first to validate, value and legitimize these characteristics belonging to their very essence. Only in this way can men, in turn, recognize, validate and give their inner feminine side the space that it deserves.
Part of my purpose in this life is to facilitate dialogue, understanding and recognition between aspects of different kinds (in this case masculine/feminine), in order to create balance between opposite poles through acceptance, healing and integration, creating in doing so empowerment where necessary.
Discovering my feminine side, recognising it, understanding it, valuing it, giving it the rightful place within me, respecting it, and legitimising it , has been a long and rocky road.
And yet, the sense of fulfillment reached, the change in my way of relating to the world by recognising and valuing both my feminine essence and the masculine aspects that live within me, motivate me to provide safe and intimate spaces where women can reconnect with their deep femininity and heal their perception of it.
What is a women’s circle?
A women’s circle is a place where women can share their concerns and their experiences, and where they can say out loud what they think or feel in an environment among equals.
A place to connect and rediscover that feminine essence that flows in feeling, listening, loving, creating, being, sensing and perceiving, away from the busy and non-stop life of the world we live in.
The spirit that flourishes and develops during these circles then expands and ends up permeating our daily lives with consciousness, thereby rubbing off on our environment.
A circle can be the support that helps you (if you wish) to take the steps you need in your life and sustain you in your changes.
WHAT DOES A WOMEN’S CIRCLE GIVE YOU?
- An intimate space, free of judgment, where you can learn how to reduce the demands on yourself and thwart your inner judge, so that lovingness towards yourself and your environment can flourish.
- The opportunity to identify, recognise and give rise to feminine aspects that most of us devalue within ourselves and reconcile ourselves with them, giving them their place and legitimising their existence.
- Reconnecting with the wisdom of your own body by developing you capability to listen to your essence through your five senses.
- A sense of belonging, tribe and sisterhood. Discovering that there can be togetherness and mutual support among women, debunking the belief that women are ‘bad’ with each other reducing thereby the feeling of loneliness.
Perimenopause and the shaman archetype: the path to menopause
A woman’s life is traversed by three crucial stages that mark both the beginning and the end of a larger cycle of her femininity: the first bleed, possible motherhood, and the last bleed. Each stage involves a mourning: that of the girl who becomes a woman; that of the woman who becomes a mother (or not); and that of the mother (or not a mother) who becomes what some authors call the archetype of the “shaman woman”.
The word shaman, originating from the language of the Tungus (reindeer herders from Lake Baikal in Russia), comes from the word “sa” (to know) and means “she who knows”. The cessation of our monthly cycle is about returning to the core of our soul, reconnecting with the essence of our femininity, our most authentic self, filled with the self-reliance we had before puberty. A reconnection with a knowing self that says it’s truth, is wild at times, is instinctive, doesn’t mince words, is intuitive, creative and enriched by life experiences.
And Perimenopause is about this long pilgrimage women accomplish until they reach the moment of their last bleed. It’s an inward journey, strewn with vital and existential balances. It is a deep-down review of the cornerstones around which they have built their identity, through their experiences in childhood, youth, adulthood and motherhood (or not). A journey, during which women gather the forlorn pieces of their life, put them back together and give birth to a new self.
This is a crucial transitional moment in a woman’s life that deserves to be honoured and celebrated. It is a rite of passage to another phase that (once past the possible storms along the road) brings wholeness, harmony and well-being.
However, for many women it is still a stage with insufficient visibility, often lived out in the shadows and in solitude. Because in that need to follow the structure of pure logic and rationality, of strength, hierarchy and, sometimes, of power, to feel recognised and validated, women disconnect from their body and inner wisdom.
The subtlety of the start of this journey leads to much of it taking place in the dark, where due to ignorance and often due to disconnection from their own feelings, women fail to recognise and identify the precursory signs of the upcoming last monthly cycle. Failing to recognise these signs makes it difficult for us to go through this essential life journey, with love, self-compassion, acceptance and awareness.
Often, we women deny, through oblivion, the moment that is approaching. We fear what it might entail in relation to our feminine being, our function and our value. Hence, we start facing the process when it is already full on and then experience it with a feeling of impotence and fear, leaving the process in the hands of a purely medical vision.
“What you deny you submit. What you accept transforms you” – Carl Jung
WHAT DO I OFFER YOU?
I wish to help women between the age of forty and fifty to go through this crucial stage of life trustfully and in peace.
Through individual and/or group counselling, I wish to offer you a new perspective of this period of your life by rethinking the beliefs, fears and perceptions you have about it. I want to share resources, understandings and psycho-emotional tools that allow you to recognise the signals of your biological clock when it strikes the beginning of your journey (perimenopause) towards your last bleed, and allow you to support yourself throughout this journey so that you may welcome your last bleed with acceptance and harmony, while regaining a sense of wholeness and fulfilment.
Motherhood as a journey of reunion with your own body and personal growth
Motherhood for me hasn’t just meant the arrival into my life of a new form of love, which had nothing to do with what I had imagined, but also the beginning of the development and growth of new aspects in me that I hadn’t known beforehand.
A path of transformation full of excitement and joy, as well as fear, insecurity, worry, frustration, exhaustion, fatigue, upset and self-discovery, during which I have often felt lost and adrift, losing sight of how it feels to be just that woman and person that emerges once you strip of the different roles.
WHAT CAN I OFFER YOU?
I would love to partner with you as you go you through those moments of befuddlement, insecurity or anguish, stress and/or life balance conflicts that sometimes arise during motherhood.
Together we will see to give voice to your concerns and to the inner and outer changes that you are experiencing so that you can welcome them and experience motherhood in fullness and joy.